To My Niece and Her Friends

This blog entry is for my niece and her friends.  She informed me that many of you read my blog so I thought what better venue to share some of my wisdom with you. So, sit back, get comfortable because you are in for some great wisdom (well at least according to me…it’s great). I am going to share some things that I wish someone had told me at your age.


I hope you enjoy!

Get Your Head Out Of Your Ass!

1. You may think you know EVERYTHING….but you really DON’T…trust me.

2. When ever you lie to your parents…they know (we really do know..), sometimes we just want to see how creative you can get so we can go and share your dumbass stories with our friends at work.

3. When seeking advice about a problem…don’t be stupid and go to your friends for help, they are just as clueless as you are. Go to an adult you admire and trust. (and NO, I don’t mean your 19 year old friend who works at McDonalds and has a car!!)

4. Boys at your age (dare I say….) are even dumber than you are. Date them so you can develop your social skills, but don’t give them what they want…..you are too valuable to give yourselves to dumbasses!!

5. Life is bigger than High School. Take this time to learn as much as you can at school because knowledge really is POWER!

6. GO TO COLLEGE!!

7. If I ever see you doing drugs (or slowly walking across a street I am driving on), I will beat you like a rented donkey. I don’t care if you are not ‘legally’ mine to beat!

Fashion Advice

1. At some point try to develop some style. (Blue jeans and t-shirts aren’t style…especially if I can see your ass crack or worse yet….you give youself a saggy ass with them).

2. Try not to dress like everybody else….but don’t try too hard to dress like you are different (Goths….. I am talking to you! )(Also, if you are even thinking of stretching your earlobs with plastic disks……DON’T!)

3. Always wear good clean underwear!

Serious Advice

1. I know you don’t know who you are yet, but from what I have seen - you all have gifts to share with others. Use them!

2. Always remember how much you are worth….because some people will try to make you feel like you are less than you are…don’t let them.

3. Life can be hard if you are not prepared for it. Prepare yourselves now that you have a chance….

4. Pick good friends. The good ones will tell you when you are being a jack-ass, but still like you despite that fact.

5. When ever you try to ‘get away’ with something…the only person you are hurting is yourself.

6. Hard work DOES bring great rewards. If you want something….WORK FOR IT!

7. Try not to feel sorry for yourselves…..it just wastes your time and takes you nowhere.

8. If you are responsible with small things….you will be trusted with greater ones.

Well, I hope these words of wisdom help you at some point in your lives. I am pretty sure you will all be great women…and I hope I can one day say ‘I knew you when…’.